Category: Uncategorized Page 49 of 157

I was in a pizza restaurant recently and we noticed that it could use a little maintenance. The wall of the booth we were at had a hole where a switch or outlet would have gone – except it was just a hole with exposed wires. I covered it up with a bright red piece of paper as a not-so-subtle suggestion that they at least put a $.79 plastic face-plate on it.

Two large sodas later I headed to the restroom. Just above and to the left of the urinal was a picture with the company’s first restaurant. Written in pen, in very small ink next to the picture, was the note, “Hidden Message” with an arrow.

Curious, I lifted up the picture – it was on a hinge of sorts – and saw the “Hidden Message”. I quote:

“Go to hell” with a crudely drawn picture of a penis.

I was disappointed and deeply amused. What a totally different world we live in. If it had been me – and if I was the kind of person to vandalize – I would have written the numbers from Lost, added GPS coordinates, and maybe some cuneiform or Sumerian.

The author really wasted an opportunity to be clever…

Anyway, I didn’t add to this. I just lowered the picture, washed my hands, and went back to the table.
In other news… I’ve been watching the Dilbert TV show on DVD. A few marathon sessions of that will give you a whole new perspective on work. Not a good perspective, mind you, but a new one.

So, Thunder(cat) hung out with me while I watch some TV and had a snack. We also played our version of “fetch” – which involves me rolling a ball towards him and him smacking it with a paw a couple of times. And then me fetching the ball and rolling it to him again.

Hey, he’s a cat

After my recent blood donation, I “liked” Keebler on Facebook and thanked them for providing cookies at the drive. They liked my comment and responded with:

“Uncommonly good deed deserve uncommonly good cookies, friend”

So, clearly, I’m “in” with the cookie overlords. You may begin sending me tribute now.
On a more serious note, UA has a Zips Assistance Pantry set up for next week. Faculty and Staff were encouraged to bring in shampoo, toothpaste, toilet paper, etc. for students that were struggling. I made a trip to dollar general and loaded up – and this morning my co-workers and I dropped the items off.

It’s a good thing and I’m glad I was able to help – but it’s also really sad. I think there’s an assumption that if a parent can send their kid to college, they can help out with the day to day stuff too – and that’s not always the case.

In other news… I’ve not been as fanatical about my swimming this year. I haven’t been going as often or swimming as far. I think I got a little burned out last year and haven’t had the motivation. And it’s beginning to show on my waistline. I haven’t had to change pant sizes yet, but that’s the way things are heading. I need to do something, but swimming is the only exercise that didn’t bore me to tears. Maybe I need to try the 100 push-ups challenge again…

Finally, I’ve got a new origami project in the works. I’m going to do a mosaic with a space invader figure. The main part of the project will be at least 176 pieces of paper – and that doesn’t count the connector pieces. I haven’t figured those up yet since they aren’t visible, but I’ll need to get some paper for those at some point. Lot of folding to do, but it should be fun.

I ordered some girl scout cookies from one of my co-workers and the order came in recently. And… I was a little disappointed. The cookies were tasty, but kinda small. There was also more air and packaging in the box than cookies as well. I also found out that the troupe only makes 50 cents on each box – and the boxes are $4.00 each. I think this may be my last order of cookies from the Girl Scouts. Too bad – they really did taste good.

Playing a game on my computer recently, I discovered a new difficulty level. In addition to Normal, Hard, and Torment, I also have: Cat. In this mode, Thunder(cat) drops a paw onto the back of my mouse-moving hand and proceeds to randomly flex his claws. He especially enjoys doing this while I’m fighting a huge boss. Or he’ll stand directly between me and the screen and bat at the movement of the cursor. I’d get mad at him, but he’s just trying to get my attention – and, well, he’s a cat. A certain amount of “jerk behavior” is to be expected.
In other news… I went and gave blood yesterday at Best Buy. Well, at the Red Cross set-up in the Best Buy storage room. This puts me at 71 pints – one away from 9 gallons life time. Which is kind of amazing. And if you’re kinda gross, that’s almost 2 Home Deport orange buckets-of-blood.  Not that I recommend buckets as an effective way to transport blood.

The staff at the blood drive were all business – which I guess is okay. Though I would have liked a smile or two. I mean, I try to help them along with the process since I know what steps are next. And I’ve got awesome veins – or so I’ve been told. They were all a little grumpy – but I guess working on the weekend will do that.

The donation was uneventful and in the snack area I saw that Keebler had donated the cookies. Which was a nice thing to do, so I liked their page on facebook. And free cookies always wins over $4.00 a box cookies.

Sorry, Girl Scouts.

The other day, as I was getting ready to go outside, I noticed that I had an opossum the size of a water buffalo in my backyard. Okay, maybe not quite that big, but still pretty good sized. It was daytime and he was just wandering around slowly and somewhat aimlessly in the yard. I went out the front door and circled around the house to put a fence between us and check things out.

The opossum barely acknowledged me and seemed to be limping a bit. I couldn’t tell if it was sick or what – I found out later they are just like that.

We regarded each other for a few minutes, then both went about our business. He was gone when I checked later in the evening. I also may have seen a new neighbor – there was a guy looking at the opossum through a gap in the fence that separates my yard from the house that had been vacate since I moved in. I said hello and waved and he waved back – and then took off without saying anything. Hmmm… was he scared of the opossum – or of me?

The next day, I smelled skunk when I walked outside. Opossum, skunk, cats, demonic slugs? What’s next?

Back in January I got a tooth pulled. While I was really nervous about the process, it was almost no big deal and I had little pain and a quick recovery time. Unfortunately, my insurance hasn’t paid for it yet. The dentist’s office keeps submitting it and it keeps not getting paid – and the insurance keeps saying they aren’t getting it.

Now, I like a good conspiracy as much as the next guy, but I kinda doubt some enemy of mine is intercepting the request for payment in an attempt to ruin me. I’m guessing it’s just some flaw in the system. So, I’ll need to make another call to the dentist because I got another bill and listen to how their local office tells me it’s been handled and their corporate office keeps not knowing that. Grumble.

The student government online elections kicked off last night and despite my protests that I have a life (and it’s mostly playing video games, okay?), they keep scheduling the launch after hours. So, at 7:00 I fired up my computer and launched the ballot. I also checked my work email – which was a total mistake.

As usual when I check my work email after hours, I got a message that totally pissed me off. And by “pissed off”, I mean I swore so loudly and fiercely that I scared my cat.

Deliberately obstructive, difficult, inflexible, arrogant, passive-aggressive, and self important.

In one email.

I’m not sure I could do that if I had a team of jackasses helping me – it was impressive in it’s terribleness.

I fumed, I raged – but I did not reply to the email.  Because I’m not stupid.

Instead, I tried to work out my frustrations killing monsters in Diablo 3.

Didn’t work. The game was lagging hard and my poor little wizard was getting her ass kicked because her spells wouldn’t fire.  You know how it goes.

So, I bundled up and took myself for a walk in the bitter cold and driving snow. I was out there for about an hour – including a trip to Rite-Aid for some snacks.

And it helped. I got past being angry and moved on to how I usually work around people like this – by being more clever.

I came up with 5 contingency plans and mentally worked on a calculated email response. I need to follow up on a couple of leads this morning and then I’ll respond.   I’m going for a quick re-read of the message and then an overly friendly and sickly sweet and helpful response.  Kill them with kindness.  If only that really worked…

Why are people like that? Even worse, the work I’m doing on this project is going to help our students directly. To obstruct that is to go against why we’re all here.

Ugh.

So, another busy day at work – better get to it.

My glasses finally came in, but the hours the office was open weren’t really fitting neatly into my schedule. So, I planned to go at lunch – except I had also been asked to check on my neighbor’s dogs at lunch. So, in the span of an hour, I let out my neighbor’s dogs, picked up my glasses (fitting was minimal, apparently I have a standard sized and shaped head), and grabbed a sandwich at Burger King. I had planned on staying late after work if needed since I had an appointment to do my taxes downtown – but didn’t really need to.

My appointment – according to the first phone call and email – was for 6. The phone call the night before indicated it was for 5. So, I showed up at five and was prepared to wait. I got checked in and… I waited. It was 5:25 before they could see me – and that was apparently the norm for a 5:00 time slot. I got my taxes done and it looks like I’ll be getting a little money back.

Except it’s already spoken for. My furnace went out last weekend. I called a repair company, talked to the second least engaging person I’ve ever encountered, and had a technician come out. He found the problem, got it fixed, and only charged me an arm and part of a leg.

While he was working on that, I was working on a folding project. One of my friends is a photographer and gave me some “failed” prints that she had done. I took that photo paper and folded it into a cube and a crane.

It was odd working with the photo paper. It was hard to crease, easy to tear, and generally unforgiving. And, strangest of all, it was watching me. Most of the prints were portraits and the girl in the photos kept making eye contact with me. It was, as I said, odd.

While I had the modules out on the table, I realized I looked like a really craft-oriented serial killer – and I covered the shapes when the repair guy came upstairs.

After a really stressful week of work, I left early on Friday since we finally had a nice day. I got home and decided to wash my car. There was still snow on the ground, but the sun  felt great. And the air, while not exactly “warm”, wasn’t too bad. I had on a tank top, jeans, and crocs. Then I dropped the hose and the nozzle hit the ground and sprayed me. So, I took off my shirt and finished the car washing like it was the middle of summer.

Last night, I went to Kohl’s and got three shirts and a pair of shorts. With some Kohls’ Cash, a $5.00 off certificate, and a coupon for 20% – I got out of there spending 15 bucks. Not bad.

I went into work today to catch up on a few things and when I got home, it started snowing again. So much for spring.

I’ve done a little work around the house today and I’m finishing up this entry by candle light. Not that it’s dark or anything, just because candle light is nice. Time for some more video games and laundry – and maybe some more folding. Not a bad day – nice and quiet.

[photos on my website ]

My second trip to the polar bear plunge was on a bright and sunny day in February. The terrain was muddy, the crowd was crazy, and the company was awesome. We braved the mud and got down to the ice early so my friends would have a good view. At about 30 minutes til jump time, I stripped down to my bright blue Speedo to start getting adjusted to the cold. It actually wasn’t too bad – except for when the wind blew across the lake. I walked out onto the ice to take in the sights – and because I could.

I got lined up with the rest of the red-checked wrist bands and waited in the jumper corral for our group to be called out to the ice. Because of the number of jumpers, it was a bit more regimented than last year. When it was my turn, I took a brisk walk off the end of the platform and I was in the icy water.

I knew what to expect and that actually helped. I didn’t feel any anxiety to get out of the water – it was still insanely cold, but not dangerous.

Still, we were somewhat rushed out of the water anyway. I climbed the ladder, announced the water was brisk, and went to go find my pants. The shock of the water, along with the much warmer air, gave my skin a kind of tingly force-field. I met up with my friends and got my gear, then went back to the tents to get changed.

From there, hot chocolate – and a doughnut – and then dinner with the crew.

So, next year? Maybe. It was still an adventure, but I think I’ve gotten the full experience. Anyone want to go along?

After getting Thunder(cat) in the house, I bundled back up and headed for the driveway. I share the driveway with the neighbor and he usually clears it with a slow-blower. Today, though, he wasn’t home and it was all up to me. I grabbed a shovel, took a deep breath, and set to work.

The driveway isn’t that long – as these things go – but it was long enough. And it’s brick – meaning that shoveling was a careful affair. I cleared the space in front of garage, then the neighbors garage, then the middle section, then around my car, then the rest of the drive, then a path down the sidewalk in front of the houses, then my steps, then the neighbors…

Which is when I heard the sound of a garage door opener and my neighbor’s son walks up. He’s amazed by how much I’ve done and says he’ll get out the snow blower as soon as he clears his truck.

By this point I’m wiped out and ready to call it a day. But, instead, I pull my car into the garage and clear their back porch while he goes sailing past with the blower.

I was a little cranky – I mean, I had already done all the work and he was going to “wrap it up” with the snow blower. And then I saw him head down the street to clear all the sidewalks, all the walkways, and all the driveways. Of everyone on the block.

So, yeah.

I did a little more work and then realized he didn’t have gloves. I offered him some and he declined and I told him I was done for the day.

I headed back in, stripped off in the basement and put all my dirty, wet, snow-covered and sweaty clothes right in the washer.

And then I had some lunch. I saw him leave in his truck a bit later as I got ready to go to the eye doctor.

I got there a little early, checked in, and waited for my appointment time – then waited a bit more. The assistant did a few tests and then took me to the exam room, where I waited some more.

For about a 1/2 hour.

Then a guy came in and introduced himself as a optometry student. He did the exam and spent about 100 hours shining a beam of light slightly brighter than the surface of the sun into my eye. And then the other one. Eventually, he finished up and I asked if he could see what I was thinking – or if he’d seen my soul.

He left and I waited some more.

Finally, the doctor came in and did a shorter version of the same exam and then told me that I was at risk for glaucoma. Oh, nice. Thank you for that. They suggested more tests and sent me on my way to pick out new frames.

1. I first asked about glasses with magnetic clip on frames. Nope, my insurance doesn’t cover those.

2. I then picked out some nice frames – though the color was too bright. Nope, they don’t make those any more. The company might have some extra ones laying around, but it would take longer to ship them.

3. I find another pair that I don’t hate – because, really, I didn’t like any of the frames they had – and I ask if the earpiece comes in a different color or if there is a similar frame. The guys comes back with a bunch of frames in what I’m guessing is a shoe box to see if can find some different ear pieces to swap out and I give up and settle for another extra-plain style.

Even with my insurance my debit card begins quietly weeping. The best part was when I showed them photos of a previous Halloween costume with costume contact lenses – the staff thought that was pretty great. My new glasses won’t be in for a couple of weeks.

So, on my day off:

1. Terror in the bathroom
2. Thunder(cat)’s Bad Day and gum disease.
3. Mountains of snow and stuck in my driveway.
4. Staring into the sun and being threatened with glaucoma.

Can I please go back to work tomorrow?

I don’t take much time off and I hope the following two part series will help to illustrate why.

I work up this morning at about the same time I do on a regular day – except I didn’t feel regular. I felt like a facehugger had made out with me in my sleep and an alien was going to burst through some part of my body.

Anticipating trouble, I went downstairs only long enough to get a candle and a lighter. I figured the candle on it’s own would be useful since I don’t have a fan in the bathroom and if this was demonic indigestion, well, the candle might help there too.

What follows is so unspeakable that I won’t speak about it. I will, however, say that Thunder(cat) wandered in and then quickly ran back out. There are some things even my little furry warrior can’t handle.

When I was as stable as I expected to get, I took some pepto and got dressed for the day.

I pulled the car out of the garage and eyed the driveway as it warmed up. I have a front wheel drive car and last night’s snowmageddon (yes, it’s a real word) had covered the drive in several inches of doom.

I got Thunder into his cat carrier, covered up the front with a towel, and loaded him into the car. The vet is only a few minutes away from my house, but I had trouble just getting off my street. A neighbor helped shovel out my tires when I got stuck and Thunder and I were on our way.

Thunder(cat) didn’t seem to mind the carrier – but he hates car rides. He let out a series of plaintive wailing meows the entire way there and there was no consoling him. I got him in the vets office where he settled down a bit – though he did hiss at one of the cats that lived there and got too close to the carrier.

When we got him in the exam room, he didn’t want to come out of the carrier. The vet and I took the carrier apart and Thunder got an exam – and his teeth checked.

My cat has gingivitis.

While we talked about getting him in for a cleaning, the assistant came in to trim his claws.

When I say that “he didn’t care for that”, it would be in much the same way that Ohio State fans don’t care for Michigan.

Still, the vet praised him for being such a good cat. I held Thunder while the vet went to get the shots and then administered them. Thunder was reasonably calm about that – but it may be that he was just too stressed out to care. I got the carrier back together and paid the bill.

Just before I left I asked the vet if there was anything to the “pets sense when owners are hurt and try to help”. He implied that there was and I felt at once better about Thunder – and guilty because he had dental problems.

I got Thunder home and got stuck in the driveway. I got him inside and proceeded to Part Two of the day.

Yesterday I was invited to a birthday party for an 8 year old girl. I wasn’t feeling 100%, but figured I could put in appearance. And since I’d really don’t have much in common with 8 year girls, I brought paper. The first time someone mention valentines and hearts, I got out the stack of red paper I had and asked if anyone wanted to make paper hearts. The response was enthusiastic and we had most of the kids and several adults carefully following my instructions. In no time, we had a table covered in hearts. I had some veggies and cake – skipping the pizza (should have been a warning sign as to how bad off I really was), and then headed home.

Where I went directly to bed. The mild headache I got at the party ramped way up into a full on migraine. I was sensitive to light, ached all over, and got some massive chills – even though I was sweating under the covers.

At one point, Thunder(cat) hopped up on the bed and began to ardently lick my head.

Now for those of you that believe that pets can sense when their owners are sick and try to help care for them, let’s assume that Thunder knew I had a headache and was trying to make me feel better.

For the more skeptical, I’m guessing it was the only exposed area of me and I was too weak to fend him off – and he just likes licking things. Or he figured I was going to die and decided to get an early start on eating me.

Anyway, lets assume that he really did care about me and was trying to make me feel better.

I drank a lot of water and only got out of bed to pee. I did text Jim and asked him to bring me a chocolate shake. He did, I had a little of it, and it was enough to set me over the edge and make me throw up.

Now, if throwing up was an olympic sport I would not have gotten the gold. But, silver? Yep, I would have gotten the silver. Or at least bronze if the judges took away points for form.

I spit up a little blood when I was done – yeah, it was that bad – and the headache was finally broken. I sat on the bathroom floor and literally wept with relief. I drank more water and was finally able to go to sleep.

I got up around 9 today with a mild headache, a sore throat (hmmm… wonder how that happened?) and a frankly horrible taste in my mouth. I was also a little dizzy and apparently dehydrated – even with all the water I had. I had some fruit, did some laundry, and just pretty much loafed today with video games and cartoons. The horrible taste hasn’t gone away, but it’s far better than the visit from Captain Tripps I had yesterday. I was pretty sure I wasn’t going to die, but if an angry newborn goddess of wisdom had chiseled her way out of my forehead, I wouldn’t have been surprised.

Hmmm… well, I guess I’m doing better. Managed to work a Stephen King reference and some Greek mythology into that last paragraph. Guess I’m on the mend.

Time to check on the laundry and maybe take a nap.

I got home a little bit ago, pulled in my garage, and shut the door. While it was closing, I happened to look up at the sky.

It’s a cold clear night here in Akron – clear enough to see the stars. I like living in a city with the hustle and bustle and all the people. But I do miss the stars. It’s kind of a rare thing to see a clear night sky in cloudy Akron, but we had one tonight.

Clear enough, anyway, to see my favorite constellation – Orion. My favorite because it’s so easy to find and identify. And because he has such an old story.

With all the light pollution, it’s tough to see the stars in the city. And easy to forget the majesty of them. We’re conditioned by necessity to not look right at the sun – but stars? We can stare at those. Stare, and wonder at our place in the universe.

The light from those stars travel an almost unimaginable distance from the vastness of space to us. And so many of them have already burned out before the light can even reach our eyes. Did they once shine on a world like ours? Were there creatures there that looked up at the sky and saw our sun as a distant star?

So, I took a moment in the quiet of the cold and dark to look up.

Just a moment.

Good night, Orion.