Today would have been Jeff’s 42nd birthday.

It’s been on my mind the past few days and I’d been trying to figure out what to do.  Should I deliberately dwell on it – and try and work through some remaining issues?  Or keep myself busy and distracted?  The first seemed self-indulgent and depressing, the second seemed shallow.  The internal debate got me worked up and I kinda broke down again.  Took myself for a walk, got settled down a bit, and decided to come up with a third option somewhere in the middle.  That being, keep busy and focus on good things about Jeff.

So, to that end:

1. I finally made contact with the financial company where Jeff had his 401k.  After slogging through several 800 numbers, the worst hold music ever, and a cranky and confusing staff person – I finally reached a pleasant and helpful person who guided me through the process and is sending some paperwork for me to complete.

2. I called Jeff’s aunt and invited her to dinner tonight.  Figured it would be a nice thing to do and good for both of us.

3. After dinner, I plan on calling one of Jeff’s sisters to see how she’s doing.  Haven’t talked to her in a bit and a friendly voice might be a good distraction for her.

I’m also thinking about having my former neighbors over for a visit this weekend.

Feels like… maybe some closure.  Small steps to move on.