A couple days ago, I found a lump. A very small and solid mass on the right side of my groin. It’s painful when I put pressure on it and it’s right where the elastic of my Speedos hits me. So, I didn’t know if the Speedo caused it – some kind of irritation – or if I noticed it because the Speedo was pressing on it.
I figured it was just some kind of irritation or ingrown hair – and if it had been on my arm or something I would have dismissed it with, “Eh, I got a bump, whatev”
But, well… it was just worrying enough to send me to the doctor. It had been awhile since I’d been in to see my primary care doctor and the practice where he worked had been absorbed into the Cleveland Clinic. They had also moved locations and so this was my first trip to the new office.
I called the new 800 number to make the appointment and was on hold for quite a while. It took a while to bring up my info and still longer to get to the doctor’s appointments – but they were able to get me in pretty quickly.
I left work early today and went over. The check in staff were a little terse – even when I had my info ready and answered everything clearly and promptly. I waited a while and then a very dispassionate nurse took me back. All the walls were white and the corridors were sterile and bland. The room was undecorated – a far cry from the perhaps over-decorated, but fun, offices they used to have.
The nurse took my vitals and was on her way with a brisk, but uninterested, efficiency.
When my doctor finally came, there was some confusion since I was being flagged as a “new” patient. Once we got past that, though, the visit was fine. I described what was going on and he put on some gloves and checked it out. And as I stood up to remove my pants he joked, “Okay, show me the goods,” – which helped put me at ease a bit.
And it’s not a big deal. I’ve got a small cyst – most likely a minor skin infection or an ingrown hair – and he thinks a course of antibiotics will likely clear it up. If not – and we’ll know more in two weeks – then surgery is an option. Though not a good one, based on the location. He also warned me not to try and pop or mess with it it, saying, “You’ll regret it,”
He led me back, noting that everything was white and it could be hard to find the exit. I remarked that there weren’t any landmarks. I made a follow up appointment with the decidedly-unfriendly front desk staff and I was on my way to pick my prescription.
So, I’m okay and I’m still happy with my doctor, but the rest of experience had me feeling like Patient #23761987