The time change threw me this morning, I had my clock set ahead and then it went and set itself – I was up way earlier than I had planned. I had a little breakfast, said good-bye to my cat, then got in the car and headed to Wheeling, WV. It was raining part of the time and all I had for company was the radio and the occasional suggestion from my GPS. The drive was uneventful and couldn’t help but remember the last time I drove that stretch of highway by myself. That time, I was headed for a funeral.
I got into town a little earlier than I had expected and stopped to get some snacks for the drive back before I went to Jeff’s sister’s house. She met me at the door and was happy to see me. She showed me some scrapbooks she was working on with picture’s of Jeff for her niece and nephew – and a couple of the photos made us both tear up.
She drove us to lunch and we had a nice meal, and reminisced about Jeff while we ate – both careful to stay clear of the more difficult memories.
After lunch, she drove us out to the cemetery. She and her siblings had scattered some of Jeff’s ashes next to where their parents were buried after the funeral, but they had only recently gotten the headstone in place. This was the first time I’d been back since the funeral and as I walked down the path and saw the headstone for Jeff, the floodgates opened up. I know he wasn’t there and even the ashes and headstone are just symbols – but it didn’t matter. We both stood there for a while and wept.
When we were both a little more under control we talked and shared stories. The day had turning to a beautiful one and as sad as it was, it was nice to be outside in the quiet of the cemetery.
We didn’t stay long – I think it was too rough on us both – and she suggested we stop at a park and enjoy the day before she had to go into work and I had to get back on the road. We talked some more and then it was time to go.
There were hugs at the door and a sad goodbye – and then I was on the road headed home. My GPS tried to steer me wrong a couple times, but the road was familial and I stayed the course.
It was a difficult trip, but I think a good and necessary one. I think it did Jeff’s sister some good as well. She had asked me as we left the cemetery if I felt better or worse and I really didn’t have an answer. Which is to be expected, I guess.
But I’m glad I went and I’m glad for the day.