{"id":221,"date":"2006-03-08T15:31:00","date_gmt":"2006-03-08T15:31:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/thunderofwade.com\/blog\/2006\/03\/08\/zombies\/"},"modified":"2006-03-08T15:31:00","modified_gmt":"2006-03-08T15:31:00","slug":"zombies","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thunderofwade.com\/blog\/2006\/03\/08\/zombies\/","title":{"rendered":"zombies"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Almost forgot.  I had a dream last night that I was at my grandmother&#8217;s house in Illinois and we were in the backyard &#8211; being freaked out by the literal army of zombies slowing heading our direction.    I got the family that was with me inside and started to batten down the hatches.  <\/p>\n<p>There was a knock at the front door and it was a friend of my grandmother&#8217;s  &#8211; fortunately not zombified.   I let her in and as I closed the door she said that her family was still in the van.   I opened the door and sure enough &#8211; there was a mini-van full of people, just sitting there.   I motioned for them to come inside and watched as they laboursly got out of the van.   They were all wearing huge winter coats and carrying pastries, juice, and coffees.  <\/p>\n<p>Most of them got up on the porch and then just stood there &#8211; watching the zombies walk slowly up the street.   I totally lost it at this point and started grabbing them by their coats and literally throwing them into the house.    The lady on the stairs, who seemed more slack-jawed than the rest, was watching the zombies get closer and closer to her.   I wasn&#8217;t sure if I was going to be able to reach her in time and decided that if she didn&#8217;t move on her own and a zombie grabbed her &#8211; I was going to leave her and get my ass in the house.  <\/p>\n<p>The rest of the losers finally inside, I grabbed at her and managed to pull her inside with a few seconds left to close and bar the door &#8211; then realized I&#8217;d left all the potential weapons in the now inaccessible garage.  I yelled at them for a few minutes in the living room and told them that if any of them did anything stupid, I&#8217;d cut them up and throw them back out there.   They just looked at me and sipped their beverages.<\/p>\n<p>Then I woke up &#8211; with a headache &#8211; and pissed off.     Word to the wise, if the zombie horde ever rises up &#8211; you had damn well better listen to me when I tell you to move.   &#8216;Cause I&#8217;ll leave you to them if you&#8217;re worried about spilling your cappichino.  <\/p>\n<p>later&#8230;<\/p>\n<div class=\"blogger-post-footer\"><img width='1' height='1' src='https:\/\/blogger.googleusercontent.com\/tracker\/7938355-114183260174115055?l=approximatelyequalto.blogspot.com' alt='' \/><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Almost forgot. I had a dream last night that I was at my grandmother&#8217;s house in Illinois and we were in the backyard &#8211; being freaked out by the literal army of zombies slowing heading our direction. I got the family that was with me inside and started to batten down the hatches. There was [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"_bluesky_dont_syndicate":"","_bluesky_syndication_accounts":"","_bluesky_syndication_text":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-221","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"amp_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thunderofwade.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/221","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thunderofwade.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thunderofwade.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thunderofwade.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thunderofwade.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=221"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/thunderofwade.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/221\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thunderofwade.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=221"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thunderofwade.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=221"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thunderofwade.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=221"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}