Yes, it’s a video game post. \u00a0But read it anyway because it’s funny.<\/p>\n
So, finally, my valiant party reaches the gates of Sanctuary’s heaven. One last battle against the Prime Evil – Diablo.<\/p>\n
Just before we cross the entrance Tyrael, the former archangel, stops.<\/p>\n
“Yo,” he says as I paraphrase, “Imma just gonna sit this one out and chill right here. Good luck with that final battle against my arch-enemy and all,”<\/p>\n
Really, Tyrael? You’re gonna sit this one out? ‘Cause that flaming sword seems to work pretty well against those 10,000 demons we killed to get here.<\/p>\n
Fine. Jerk.<\/p>\n
I’ve got a Templar watching my back and we head on into the Silver Spire. Suddenly, a cage of bone bursts from the ground and forms around the Templar.<\/p>\n
“Oh,” he says as I paraphrase again, “I appear to be trapped here. Go on without me. Terribly sorry. Good luck, pip pip cheerio.”<\/p>\n
Really, Templar? ‘Cause I’m pretty sure that the big ass sword I GAVE you should be able to break that cage in about one swing. If you want to be a little bitch and just sit there, so be it. I don’t need your punk ass – though that periodic healing you’ve been doing all along would come in really handy vs. the end all be all of evil. Also? You can’t die – so why are you sitting there hiding and crying?<\/p>\n
With a sign of disgust, my Demon Hunter approaches Diablo on her own. About midway through the fight, he pulls a cheap move and teleports her to another realm where she has to fight a clone of herself and a clone of Diablo. Or something, I wasn’t really paying attention. We killed everything there and teleported back to kick Diablo’s ass.<\/p>\n
When the smoke finally cleared and Diablo was no more, Tyrael, the Templar, and some random angels show up. They are all like, “We defeated the Prime Evil – yea for us! We totally rock!”<\/p>\n
Really? “WE?” Where the frak were you when he lit the Demon Hunter on fire? Huh? Could you have stopped by with a bucket of water or something? Maybe you could have tossed in some healing orbs from the sidelines. Nothing?<\/p>\n
Fine, whatever. Jerks.<\/p>\n
Good game, though.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Yes, it’s a video game post. \u00a0But read it anyway because it’s funny. So, finally, my valiant party reaches the gates of Sanctuary’s heaven. One last battle against the Prime Evil – Diablo. Just before we cross the entrance Tyrael, the former archangel, stops. “Yo,” he says as I paraphrase, “Imma just gonna sit this […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"_bluesky_dont_syndicate":"","_bluesky_syndication_accounts":"","_bluesky_syndication_text":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1521","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"amp_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thunderofwade.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1521","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thunderofwade.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thunderofwade.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thunderofwade.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thunderofwade.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1521"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/thunderofwade.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1521\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1522,"href":"https:\/\/thunderofwade.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1521\/revisions\/1522"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thunderofwade.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1521"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thunderofwade.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1521"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thunderofwade.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1521"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}