I got a message sent to the webmaster email from a parent about a month ago. I get a lot of email and most of it I just skim and forward – or pop off a quick reply to guide someone to a resource.
This one I read – then read again.
The parent said in the email that her son had finally told her why he dropped out of school. That a professor, in a classroom, had equated being gay to rape. He tried to get some assistance and wasn’t taken seriously. It bothered him so much that he didn’t want to be in our classrooms anymore.
I read it again, then forwarded to the appropriate office to investigate and respond to it.
Now, what I know about this is so vastly overshadowed by what I don’t know it might as well be a thimble of kool-aid on Jupiter.
What was really said? What was the context? Who did the student talk to? How was that presented? What action was really taken? How much was real? And how much was an overreaction?
I don’t know. And I’m not in a position to know. It’s not important to my job and it’s been given to the right people to resolve.
And yet… it keeps bothering me. So, I reached out to the office that I forwarded this to and got a response today. They haven’t yet met with the student, though a meeting is scheduled. And they haven’t responded to the parent at all – which surprised me a bit since they initiated the email in the first place. They don’t know which class or which professor, if this was said inside or outside the classroom. Or even what was really said and the context.
Though, it would be a huge stretch to find some context where this wasn’t horrific.
And once they do know, they aren’t allowed to talk to me about it to preserve the privacy of the student – which I get, but is also frustrating.
I’m a problem solver by my nature and this isn’t something I’m allowed to solve – or even know the solution when it is solved.
I’m frustrated and angry and I feel a little let down. You hear about things like this happening all the time in the news and I had naively thought, “well, that couldn’t happen here. We’re better than that,”
And we are. Except when sometimes maybe we aren’t.
I guess what troubles me so much about this is that it’s intended to make gay people feel bad about themselves. That we’re supposed to feel ashamed and be reviled. That we’re wrong – just for being who we are.
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There’s been a flyer going around – on the internet and IRL – encouraging people to contact the Mayor’s office and then also to protest the Akron Pride festival. It was filled with the usual hateful rhetoric and I’d generally dismiss it – but, like the problem in the classroom, this hit close to home. This is my town and we should be better than this.
So, I’ve decided that this year – my first year – I’m going to Pride.
I don’t plan on staying the whole time. And I’m really not good with crowds. But I think it’s important to be counted. And maybe see the enemy face to face too.
I got some new socks to wear with my kilt and a matching t-shirt. Looking forward to seeing my friends, marveling at the community, and just being a part of it all. And relying on my speed and situational awareness to keep me safe if things go south.
In the grand scheme of things, it’s not much. One more middle-aged gay guy at a pride festival.
But, it matters to me. To stand – and dance, maybe – with my brothers and sisters.
Who just want a damn wedding cake.